Taking Care

You actually remembered and called me up on my birthday yesterday! I seriously did not expect it. When I saw your name on the display on the ringing phone, I was pleasantly surprised. Your birthday wishes were nice, but they came with a bit of an aftertaste or slightly bitter undertone: besides the usual wishes for good health and good luck, you also wished for me to be able “to take care of the thing eventually”.

You did not elaborate, but I could guess that the thing is my inappropriate feelings for you. Glad to hear that it’s still on your mind sometimes and that you’re not completely oblivious to it or ignoring it. But then again, I didn’t really like the way you phrased it or put it as a side note amongst the birthday wishes. And how am I supposed to take care of it? It’s not like a chore I could put into my schedule. There’s nothing really I could do to change my feelings from one day to the other. Granted, it got better already or changed a lot at least. I mentioned it before: my romantic, lovey-dovey feelings for you are gone and for the most part have been replaced by spiteful ones. But you don’t know this. So you telling me to take care of it the way you did just feels wrong.


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